August Review List

EDIT/UPDATE: Ignore.

Check out the edited release list for August 2007. Here you can see the games that our newly installed and currently growing review staff will be trying to complete by month's end.


DS
Picross DS
Mega Man Star Force: Pegasus/Leo
Luminous Arc
Heroes of Mana

Wii
Super Mario Strikers Charged
Madden NFL 08

PS2/3
Madden NFL 08
Splinter Cell Double Agent
Persona 3

XBox 360
Bioshock


Wanna help out? Think you've got what it takes? Send us a line and we'll discuss your possible contributions.

Ike isn't a new character, dammit!

Lots of media outlets and blogs are reporting the arrival of Super Smash Bros. "new" brawler Ike from Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance for the Nintendo GameCube. Enough with this, I will clarify.

See this kid?

That's Ike.

See this kid?



That's Marth.

From a literary standpoint, Ike is a very different character from Marth. He has a different name and his sword is spray-painted gold. From a SSB perspective, all of you SSB losers have been fooled. If you look closely, you'll notice both Ike and Marth have similar colored hair. That's what gives it all away.

These character "changes" are just as dynamic as the transitions between SSBM Bowser to SSBB Bowser and SSBM Link to SSBB Link. This time, it's from Marth to Ike (Marth = Ike!!!1!!!).

Fanboys, don't talk to me about this kinda shit: I know my stuff. If you want to see new characters, wait until the next trailer, bitch.

Bioshock Gets Dangerous

I'm the exact opposite of what Irrational Games' Ken Levine's proposed, biologically modded, heartwarming do vs. don't kill ethic incorporated-into-a-deep-sea-diving-first-person-adventure game Bioshock is marketing. At least, from a moral standpoint. When I eventually pick up Bioshock in August, September, or whenever I obtain a 360 (it releases for 360 and PC Aug. 21), the first thing I want to do is telekinetically pick up a kicking, screaming Little Sister, light her on fire, throw her flailing body onto a Big Daddy , and happily look down upon the beast as he cries to the gods in disbelief for all he has been designed to do is protect the Little Whore. It'll be the same cry of disbelief Levine will give after witnessing my moral compass spin wildly out of control at the next Bioshock/Microsoft press junket or some shit like that. Luckily for Ken Levine, you can't kill Little Sisters on camera.

Fuck.

Not satisfied? Watch this new Bioshock developer interview; it'll give more of the goods on those telekinetically induced fireballs mentioned previously. I suppose that was the whole point of this post anyway.

This is... Funny

My friend Matt, while at the local Target, took some awesome pics of what could possibly be the greatest, most degrading piece of imagery toward Microsoft's estimated 3-5% failure rate. Sure, I guess this counts too.

Ok, I'll admit, this could still easily be within the 3-5% range. And being in a Target doesn't add more credibility to the 33% theory. But it's fun to pretend. Maybe it's funnier that the Target folks don't even care.

Brawl Update: Wario

It's about time we learned about Wario. He's just about in every screenshot we've seen so far. Seriously, this stuff should've been discussed the first day Smash Bros. DOJO!! went online. Check this shit out:

"It’s rumored that this unpredictable character will give birth to a form of martial arts that other characters cannot even see."

Can't even see? I'm assuming Sakurai's referring to the Wario Waft.

Source [Smash Bros. DOJO!!]

Past updates after the jump.


Past Updates:
Pikachu's Final Smash
Link's Final Smash
Crates and Barrels
Ridley Fight (Music)
Yoshi's Island
Fox
Control Schemes
Pokemans
Yoshi's Story Ending (Music)
Delfino Plaza
Cracker Launcher
Moving and Shooting
The Final Smash
Pit's Special Movies
May 22nd - May 25th

Jack Thompson Moves to the UK

Well, not exactly, but we're sure he's thinking about it. In a not entirely surprising move by the British Board of Film Classification, Manhunt 2 for PS2, PSP, and Wii will be BANNED in that one country floating above the rest of Europe.

Awwww, and we didn't even get to see some protests around the Take-Two HQ yet! No fair.

British Board of Film Classification director David Cooke had this to say:

"Rejecting a work is a very serious action, and one which we do not take lightly. Where possible we try to consider cuts or, in the case of games, modifications which remove the material which contravenes the Board's published Guidelines. In the case of Manhunt 2 this has not been possible. Manhunt 2 is distinguishable from recent high-end video games by its unremitting bleakness and callousness of tone in an overall game context which constantly encourages visceral killing with exceptionally little alleviation or distancing. There is sustained and cumulative casual sadism in the way in which these killings are committed, and encouraged, in the game."

For the full press release, hit the jump.

"Rejecting a work is a very serious action, and one which we do not take lightly. Where possible we try to consider cuts or, in the case of games, modifications which remove the material which contravenes the Board's published Guidelines. In the case of Manhunt 2 this has not been possible. Manhunt 2 is distinguishable from recent high-end video games by its unremitting bleakness and callousness of tone in an overall game context which constantly encourages visceral killing with exceptionally little alleviation or distancing. There is sustained and cumulative casual sadism in the way in which these killings are committed, and encouraged, in the game.
Although the difference should not be exaggerated the fact of the game's unrelenting focus on stalking and brutal slaying and the sheer lack of alternative pleasures on offer to the gamer, together with the different overall narrative context, contribute towards differentiating this submission from the original Manhunt game. That work was classified '18' in 2003, before the BBFC's recent games research had been undertaken, but was already at the very top end of what the Board judged to be acceptable at that category.

Against this background, the Board's carefully considered view is that to issue a certificate to Manhunt 2, on either platform, would involve a range of unjustifiable harm risks, to both adults and minors, within the terms of the Video Recordings Act, and accordingly that its availability, even if statutorily confined to adults, would be unacceptable to the public."

An appeals process is still open to Rockstar, should they choose to oppose the decision. Such a move seems likely, considering the decision originally passed down for the UK's first banned game, Carmageddon, was overturned after a secondary review.

"A decision from the BBFC such as this demonstrates that we have a games ratings system in the UK that is effective. It shows it works and works well. Any decision the BBFC takes, it takes on the basis of its remit to rate on screen entertainment," said Paul Jackson, director of the British Entertainment and Leisure Software Publishers Association (analogous to the ESRB in North America). "The games industry is a creative phenomenon that produces all kinds of games across all kinds of genres that appeal to all kinds of people across the country, young and old, male and female. The important thing to know is that all games are rated according to age suitability, with over 70 per cent of games being available to all ages over three years."

New Content for Command and Conquer 3

Major Nelson gives the heads up on four packs of XBox Marketplace downloadable content for Command and Conquer 3: Tiberium Wars. C&C fans may now download new maps (Ground Zero and a map pack including Black's Bigger Battle and Tiber River Valley) as well as a developer interview pack composed of developer commentary on all of the maps found in today's all new map pack mentioned earlier. Gamers also have the option of purchasing a gamer pics pack containing four C&C related gamer pics.

Both Ground Zero and the map pack developer commentary are free of charge. Others range from 80-500 microsoft points. All downloads will not be available in Japan (excluding Ground Zero).

Source [Major Nelson]

Brawl Update: Pikachu's Final Smash

It's looking like Final Smash week here on the Super Smash Bros. side of things. Today's Brawl update focuses on Pikachu's ultra-special attack. It makes you wonder, though. Shouldn't have these tidbits of information been released on the days that SSB characters Link and Pikachu were discussed? I mean, these are characters that have been around since the original SSB.

"Volt Tackle is unleashed! Pikachu transforms into a ball of light... You can now control that ball of light for a brief period.
Hunt them! Hunt them down!"

This looks like a move that would work perfectly with the Wiimote.

Source [Smash Bros. DOJO!!]

Past updates after the jump.


Past Updates:
Link's Final Smash
Crates and Barrels
Ridley Fight (Music)
Yoshi's Island
Fox
Control Schemes
Pokemans
Yoshi's Story Ending (Music)
Delfino Plaza
Cracker Launcher
Moving and Shooting
The Final Smash
Pit's Special Movies
May 22nd - May 25th

Video Roundup: June 18, 2007

Wow. Taking a little time off was a baaaad idea. Just look at all the videos I've managed to find (11!) and I'm ashamed to admit I gave up around halfway. Hopefully you'll learn to forgive me.

Video of the Day:

Video 1
Video 2
Video 3

With the Japanese release of Phantom Hourglass creeping up on the east side, commercials and trailers are present about. The latest trailer probably shows us the most we've seen from the DS title. Cuccoos, firetraps, and...eskimos? All wrapped in a nice, bite-sized package(s). It's also worth noting that the hourglass is officially a new item, if you hadn't already predicted.

More great videos after the jump!



Blacksite Area: 51


Trailer Park Massacre
Bunker Defense

Screwattack's List of the 10 Worst Fighting Games


Bioshock Dev Diary


DK Bongo Blast Japanese Trailer


Boogie Trailer




Guitar Hero II Mocumentary


Beautiful Katamari Montage

The Cost of Tomb Raider Anniversary (XB360)

Two weeks ago, it was speculated Tomb Raider Anniversary for the XBox 360 would be exclusive to the Markeplace through downloadable content. This speculation arose after ESRB lists displayed a series of Tomb Raider Anniversary environments listed individually with their own ESRB rating.

Click for larger image.

Today, Eidos has confirmed the situation in that Tomb Raider Anniversary for the XBox 360 will be available for download over XBox Live. However, nothing like this could ever go down without a catch.

"The game is broken into four episodes, at a total cost of 2400 MS Points ($30.00). The first two will be available in September and episodes three and four arrive 'shortly afterwards.' The curve ball is this: you need to own a copy of Tomb Raider: Legend."

It's still unknown why gamers are required to own the XBox's previous Tomb Raider outing to have the privilege of purchasing the future downloadable content. Some, including Electronic Gaming Monthly's Dan Hsu (on today's EGM Live* podcast), believe this approach is somewhat of an "experiment."

"It sounds like an experiment. 'Let's see how well episodic content sells on XBox Live Marketplace and let's see if we can get people to buy more copies of Legend'"

Considering this is one of the first retail (on PS2) games that will also be available for download, a social experiment doesn't seem too crazy.

It's also beneficial to point out that Eidos will be releasing a retail edition of Tomb Raider Anniversary for the XBox 360 later this year.

Source [1up on Tomb Raider Anniversary as DLC]
Source [1up on Tomb Raider Anniversary prerequisite]
Source [EGM Live*]